New Leaf Magazine

Friends and family often struggle with how to help someone they love or care about deal with grief. Because most people do not know how to express what they need, friends and family find themselves at a loss when trying to help. Sherry Williams White gives concrete ideas for helping which include some very practical things you can do as loved ones travel the grief journey. These tips include things you can do from the time you hear about the death, through special days and holidays as well as the anniversary date of the death.

Dr. Wolfelt explains his concept of helping the bereaved by companioning them in this excerpt from his book, Companioning the Bereaved: A Soulful Guide for Caregivers. He explains that companioning the bereaved is not about assessing, analyzing, fixing or resolving another's grief. Instead, it is about being totally present to the mourner, even being a temporary guardian of her soul. Learn from this overview how you can companion a grieving friend or family member with open heartedness and love.

As a grieving parent herself, Deb Kosmer, social worker, writer and grief specialist, shares insights on how others can support those who are grieving the death of a child. She provides practical tips for walking the journey of grief with your friends or loved ones who have had a child die. She also gives tips about what not to say and how to be a listening friend.

For those who are grieving, hearing the name of their loved one who died validates that their loved one lived and that you remember. Suzanne Howell, writer and Christian Grief Counselor, writes:

Friends and family who are silent or who would change the subject  are demonstrating discomfort with talking about the deceased.  This reaction may come from a desire to help you. They think that by not talking about your deceased husband (sister, brother, father, mother, child or friend) they are keeping you from thinking about them. We have a very technical term to apply to that reasoning, "Hogwash"! Unfortunately, it may be up to you, the griever, to inform your friends that you need to think, talk and share memories about the deceased.

Lou Ann Stanton provides clear insite on how to help grieving individuals. Through her own experience as a widow she thought she had learned to talk to those who grieve but she learned that one of the best gifts you can give to someone who is grieving is the gift of listening.

Sherry Williams White, nurse, writer and grief specialist shares practical information for helping people who are grieving.  She explains that it's not having the right words that matter.  What really matters is being present for those you love or care about when they are grieving.